Thursday, December 24, 2009

My take on Balding

I know that balding is a sensitive issue for men and so, I will try to give my opinions about this touchy subject in as delicate and kind a manner as possible.

HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH! Whew! I crack myself up sometimes...

Ben can tell you that I have been encouraging of him whilst he has been going through his hair loss. I know that it makes him sad and so I sympathize with what must be a truly disappointing aspect of his genetics. Ben has been shaving his head for quite a few years but, occasionally, he tries growing it a bit longer to see how it looks. Each time, I sweetly let him know that it's not his best look but that he can do what he chooses with his hair since I do the same with mine. (Ben would prefer me with long hair.)

I've been thinking about men and their battle with hair loss and, I'm sorry, some men just need to give it up and embrace their baldness proudly. It would certainly be a lot better than what they choose to do in whatever state of denial they are living in. Seriously... it doesn't look good, guys!

Here we have a few examples of what men try to do to deal with their hair loss and my interpretation of what it would look like were they not bald.

Here we have the Bald Mullet:

Business in front, party in the back. Whether or not it's short in front on purpose, it's still a mullet.

And this is the Bald Pompadour:

Since this guy obviously couldn't shape his pompadour in the usual way, he compensated by having his pompadour start in the back.

The Bald Pageboy:

Now, this one is NEVER okay for a guy to wear, bald or not.

The Bald Emo:

Ha! Ha! I couldn't resist!

The Bald Monk Pate:

Really tall guys have the advantage of few people seeing this type of baldness, at least until they sit down.

The Bald Geographic Design/Picture Hair:

I'm sure the poor guy in the first picture was just as bemused as the rest of us with what was going on with his hair but, really, trying to part it didn't help.

The Bald Fauxhawk:

I just couldn't make up my mind on the two bald pictures on this one.

The Bald Mohawk:

Poor Jude, I love him so, but he's just not rocking this do.

The Bald Doublehawk:

You've got to be a special sort of crazy to pull off the Doublehawk. Well... I suppose both these guys are a special sort of crazy. You won't find the first guy on the cover of Rolling Stone though... small consolation though that might be.

I couldn't resist adding the beard combover. This is how I feel about all men who deny their baldness.

Guys: Bald is gorgeous! Bald is sexy! There is almost nothing better than a bald guy who owns his do. Whether your bald is 100% natural or assisted by a razor, I'm first in line to cheer you on!

Go Bald!


Jam and Stew said...

As much as I don't like being bald, I really do have to admit that I look better when I shave it completely, and I totally agree that men should NEVER try to pull a comb-over.

Jen said...

Patrick Stewart . . . mmmmmm. . .

Anonymous said...

Bald IS sexy...rrraaarrrrr....Jeremy's uncle has an outrageous comb starts under one ear, wafts over to the other ear....He seriously is a double for Sean Connery. He should embrace this and lose the natural hair piece.
(This blog made me laugh really hard. HA HA HA!)


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